When my husband and I were first dating, we had no problem making time for one another. We spent hours on the phone every evening, and it didn’t matter if we woke up tired the next day. But something happened when things became familiar. Maybe you’ve heard, or even worse, you actually believe that all couples feel sparks at first only to settle down into a comfortable routine with one another in the best case, and a miserable out-of-love existence, in the worst case. But I’m here to tell you that there are things you can do to keep the spark alive in your relationship!
Here are 5 specific ways to reignite the spark in your relationship.
1. Talk about meaningful things. Relationship expert, Dr. John Gottman, talks about the importance of having open-ended conversations. These are the types of conversations you used to have when you were dating when you asked one another about your hopes and dreams. Talk about the things that are most important to you. (If you’re not sure where to start, try answering the questions on the Let’s flirt feature.)
2. Go on a vacation together or at least get away together for the day. Sometimes it’s a fresh place that gives us a fresh perspective on our relationship and reinvigorates the romance as we get away from the daily grind and everyday stresses.
3. Be intentional in hugging, kissing and cuddling. Physical touch produces feel-good hormones, which will bring you closer together and maybe even contribute to spicing things up in the bedroom.
4. Don’t harbor anger or bitterness. (Are you seeing your partner through a negative or critical lens because of built-up resentments?) When we feel able to talk about the things that annoy, irritate or hurt us, we can more easily let them go. This helps us feel genuinely closer to our spouse. Becoming honest leads to vulnerability which leads to greater intimacy.
What are some ways you have reignited the spark in your relationship?